In high school, some kids are voted “Most Likely to Succeed” or “Class Clown.” Me? I was voted “Most Organized.” Yep! Who knew that was even a category?

I never really thought of myself as more organized than anyone else, but I must have presented myself that way. In the years since, I never thought I struggled with “getting organized.” I knew what papers were in what piles in my law office. I had a handle on the 100+ pairs of shoes I owned, neatly resting in their California Closet cubbies. My clutter was quite organized, thank you very much!

Honestly, it’s only been the last few years that I really know what it means to be organized, and even now, I’m still a work in progress.

Organized Failure

“Get organized” is consistently a top New Year’s resolution for a lot of people; in fact, January is touted as “National Organization Month.” And “get organized” is a common refrain anytime we feel overwhelmed by something, whether it’s a project at work or a messy room at home. We tell ourselves, “If I could just get organized ….”

But here’s my beef with “getting” organized: it’s just not possible. By its very nature, “get” implies a destination, a finish line, a finite stopping place, as in “I need to get to the airport on time.” Or, something you can acquire and possess, as in “I’ve got to get a new wallet.”

Be honest. Have you ever “organized” your closet, only for it to return to messiness and disarray? I know I have! Getting organized, and then falling back into messiness made me feel like a failure. I must have been doing something wrong, or I bought the wrong bin or drawer divider.

No, I don’t want to “get” organized. I want to “be” organized.

Rethink “Organized”

Gradually, I realized that “organized” is a mindset. It’s a state of being. It’s not something you attain, but rather something you’re always engaging in. It never stops. Because once organizing stops, chaos and clutter creep back in.

This is where mindset, systems and habits come in. Getting your space—whether it’s your closet, your desk, or your pantry—de-cluttered, functional and beautiful feels amazing. Some would say lifechanging.

But without systems and habits to keep it that way, my dear, you’re just spinning your wheels. It’s human nature to fall back into old patterns and routines. Breaking out of those patterns might take some time and rewiring; two books I recommend on this topic are The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg and How to Change by Katy Milkman.

Key Takeaways

1. There’s no one size fits all when it comes to being organized.

I’ve worked with a professional organizer. I’ve read all of Marie Kondo’s books and I binged “The Home Edit” show on Netflix in a weekend. And I’m still discovering what makes sense for me, and what makes my life easier. What works for me, or your sister, or your neighbor might not work for you, and that’s okay. Goldilocks it: find what works for you and keep at it. The end result—a more spacious, beautiful, functional, cleaner (and easier to clean!)—home is worth it.

2. Stopping clutter is an act of laziness, so embrace it.

It actually takes less time and energy to put something away than to toss it in a pile and deal with it later. I got so fed up with piles of stuff that needed to be put away that I started making the effort to put an item away right after I used it or brought it in the house. I literally timed it. Turns out, it takes about 20 seconds or less to put an item where it belongs. Of course, every item needs a home so you know what to do with it or where to put it, and that’s what de-cluttering and organizing is about, initially. The problem is, that’s where most of us stop, thinking “organizing” is a one and done kind of thing. It’s not.

3. Intolerance for clutter grows over time.

As I write this post, I’m joyfully planning my first dinner party since the 2020 pandemic, and only my second time entertaining in this condo I now call home. I remember a party I threw about 12 years ago at my home in Las Vegas, where hours before the party I was doing yet another “shit shove”—cramming stacks of unopened mail and magazines into shopping bags and tossing them into the garage to make the house look neater. I don’t have to do that anymore. It’s not that I don’t occasionally have dishes in the sink or laundry waiting to be folded. But as I’ve reduced possessions, created new systems, and refined my habits, it’s easier to deal with things that used to become clutter.

*****

It’s okay if you slip back into messiness while you’re working on being organized. Keep at it and the momentum will build. You may even discover that keeping your space clean, tidy and organized is enjoyable because you like how it feels to be in the space.

Ultimately, that’s what being organized really is for me: a feeling of comfortable confidence. Being able to find what I need, when I need it. Moving from one task to another with ease. Welcoming people into my home fearing little more than a few dust bunnies under the sideboard. And walking through my front door thinking, gosh, it’s so good to be home.